Don't Send Those Cards!

My friend and new contributor at Salvo magazine, Marcia Segelstein, sent me her latest musing, "Bah Humbug on Holiday Cards" in which she writes:

It’s headline news again this year that Christmas is rapidly losing its true meaning. Department store workers aren’t allowed to wish people “Merry Christmas,” more schools are banning Christmas carols from their holiday concerts and fewer and fewer creches appear in towns across the nation. The “Christ” in Christmas was replaced with an “X” long ago.

Yep, nothing much has changed from last year. Secularization:

I know many Jews-in-name-only who have Christmas trees, too. And why not? It probably has as much meaning to them as it does to many so-called Christians.

I don’t begrudge anyone of any religious or non-religious stripe having a decorated evergreen tree in their living room. I just wouldn’t necessarily call it a celebration of Christmas.

But what about us "devout" Christians? Her point:

[D]on’t send meaningless, mealy-mouthed, generic holiday cards that might as well be celebrating the winter solstice!

In a few days, my mantlepiece will be filled, not with reminders of the gospel story of Jesus’s birth, but with professional photos of children or entire families adorning cards with inoffensive messages like “Peace and Joy.” In my neck of the woods, there seems to be a little competition going for whose children can pose the best for these annual mailings. Frankly, I don’t care. And I have a little reality check for the church-going believers out there who send these photo cards: Christmas isn’t about your lovely, smiling children or your beautifully posed family. It’s about the Son of God taking human form to save your souls.  Maybe putting Christ back into Christmas starts at home.

So, if you must send a photo of your children, include it in a card that is about the sacred nature of this miracle of miracles. Or, take a photo of your creche. At least it would be a picture of the actual Holy Family.

In case you need to run out to a store still and find appropriate cards, you might have to help a store clerk by saying that you're looking for a card with "the Lady with the Baby" on it.

Comments

[Bill R]

"So, if you must send a photo of your children, include it in a card that is about the sacred nature of this miracle of miracles."

Well, I DO have a religious card! And photos of the kids. And, um, also a photo of my new puppy. After all, "dog" spelled backwards is...

[CV]

Can you please post Marcia Segelstein's home address so I can send her a card and picture of my kids?

And my dog.

I have ALMOST as much patience for this type of rant during the Christmas season as I do for those who protest Christmas trees and such in civic spaces.

Marcia, have a cup of eggnog dear.

And relax.

[DGP]

Bah humbug back at her. If she's really so dedicated to making sure her Christianity is always and everywhere serious, she should be spending more effort on Holy Week, with a solemn nod to Epiphany, and never mind so much about the Nativity.

[Bobby Winters]

She really needs to read "A Christmas Carol."

[DGP]

Forgive me the cliched observation, but it seems to be necessary here: The "X" in "Xmas" is the standard, classical abbreviation for Christ, chi.

[labrialumn]

While I do prefer Nativity-related cards, I also very much appreciate the pictures of the family, within. It is one tiny way in this atomized society, to keep in touch.

[pilgrim kate]

Some defensive comments here.

Two years ago I decided to write far-flung friends an annual letter and send it out in the Fall, thereby relieving me of the pressure of getting such correspondence out in time for Xmas as well as separating the desire to keep in touch with friends and relations from a stronger desire to jettison the things that were getting in the way of Advent and Xmas. I do still send some Xmas cards to wish friends the joy of the Incarnation.

[Little Gidding]

Wow, I thought I was getting a little severe in making sure to postpone sending the Christmas cards until well into Advent, and to make sure that a good many of the cards had reference inside to the Christmas event (instead of having to write "Merry Christmas" on them), but this commentary is scorched earth, isn't it? But then I send Christmas cards--"Merry Christmas!"--to my friends and family, Christians, Mormons, Jews, Sikhs, Buddhists, and Atheists alike. No one has ever been offended, as far as I know. Some of my Buddhist friends even send me Christmas cards.

Why not welcome cards whenever they're sent? They're wishing you joy and peace, at minimum, and telling you that someone has a kind thought for you. And, all in all, even form letters about family news over the year are on balance fascinating and welcome. And, truth be told, the miracle of the Incarnation is indeed connected to the birth of one's own and others' children (as pictured), the Holy Family to my little family, and on and on.

God bless us, every one.

[Judy Warner]

I like getting news of people I know enclosed in Christmas cards. But one family I know sends out a card with a photo of the family on the front, and a two-page long account of what each member accomplished during the year, like a resume. Even that I wouldn't mind if they at least wished me a merry Christmas, or a happy holiday, but it's all about them with no reference to either a holiday, specific or generic, or the recipient.

[Judy Warner]

I always get my cards from the New York Metropolitan Museum of Art catalogue. They have a big selection of religious cards with art from the museum and they're the most beautiful I've seen.

[Rob G]

While I think Ms. Segelstein may have overdone it a bit, for the most part I'm with her. Spare me both the crass commercialization and the resultant trivialization of the Holy Day!

Speaking for myself, I don't think that taking such an attitude necessitates a Christianity "always and everywhere serious." The proliferation of "Christmas beers" and "Winter Ales" in my refrigerator will prove otherwise.

So I celebrate and rejoice by all means. But I also try not to let that aspect of the season negate the seriousness.
As in most things, it's a question of balance.

[DGP]

>>Spare me both the crass commercialization and the resultant trivialization of the Holy Day!

Indeed, but you've loaded the dice with these words, e.g., "crass.". Why should I scorn cards that are inexplicit or evasive with respect to Christmas, when the sending of the cards is itself only tangentially related to the Feast, and may be regarded as a product of the commercialization and so-called trivialization to be condemned? Did the Lord command us to send solemn Christmas cards? Is it a venerable part of the Patristic tradition? Nonsense! The scorning of the "X" in "Xmas cards" is fairly representative of the entire spirituality here: A canonization of ancillary traditions in order to justify a condescending attitude toward one's fellows. The Lord himself had some pretty scornful words about this approach to religion.

[Rob G]

DGP -- chill, dude. I was hyperbolizing to make a point (as I believe the author of the original piece was.) I guess I shoulda put a smiley after that sentence.

[W.E.D. Godbold]

I agree with CV that she needs a cup of eggnog. A very large cup. With some added holiday spirits. And then she needs to use it to wash down about 10 mg of diazepam. It's obvious she's under too much stress.

I like getting long (non-resume-like) letters from families I care about at Christmas (or any other time, really). Pictures are nice as well. We put them on the fridge and say: "Wow, they sure have grown!" and other cliched things about the passage of time and the shortness of this span of ours on the Earth.

The problem is when the busyness and the rush take away from the celebration. I like Christmas and its twelve days of feasting because life gets slow, long, and rich. We get a glimpse of what Tolkien said the year 1420 was like in the Shire--something tinged with immortality. Our Lord approaches...then arrives...and all manner of things are well. Of course it's just a preview of what it'll really be like when he comes. But it's a real preview, I think.

[Judy Warner]

I don't think there's anything wrong with traditions that have grown up around Christmas, even if we weren't commanded by the Lord to observe them. We are earthly beings, and are bound to add our own earthly delights to such a joyous occasion as the birth of our Saviour. I'm not thinking of the commercialism, but sending cards, having a Christmas tree, singing carols around the neighborhood, drinking Christmas beers, baking cookies, going to see the Nutcracker or the Christmas Revels -- these are not sacrileges but ways of adding to the celebration.

[W.E.D. Godbold]

...and then you get the Visa bill in January. (Cue scary music)
:-)

[Rob G]

"I'm not thinking of the commercialism, but sending cards, having a Christmas tree, singing carols around the neighborhood, drinking Christmas beers, baking cookies, going to see the Nutcracker or the Christmas Revels -- these are not sacrileges but ways of adding to the celebration."

100% agreement, Judy. My only concern is that in our culture these things often seem to obscure the meaning of the celebration rather than augment it. The answer, of course, is not to dump all those things you mentioned, but to keep them in proper balance.

[DGP]

>>DGP -- chill, dude. I was hyperbolizing to make a point (as I believe the author of the original piece was.) I guess I shoulda put a smiley after that sentence.

Fair enough. Sorry. If Mr. Kushiner was sharing this material with us tongue-in-cheek, perhaps the smiley face should have appeared in the original post. But if this "musing" from Marcia Segelstein is representative, I'm very glad I haven't subscribed to Salvo.

>>I don't think there's anything wrong with traditions that have grown up around Christmas, even if we weren't commanded by the Lord to observe them.

I think you miss my point. I wasn't saying we shouldn't do them because the Lord didn't command them, but that we shouldn't insist so strenuously on a sacred form to a tradition that isn't particularly sacred in the first place -- e.g., sacred words and images for non-sacred Christmas cards. I'm all in favor of Christmas cards, even with sacred images -- like you, I use mostly Met cards -- but it's Pharisaical in the worst sense to scorn those who send "holiday cards" or family photos or the like.

[Judy Warner]

DGP, I take your point. However, there is another consideration, and that is our national traditions. All my life until recently, religious people sent religious cards. Non-religious people sent secular cards. The Post Office provided stamps for both traditions. (Now they provide Christmas, winter, Kwaanza, Eid and Hannukah.) Before I became a Christian I sent secular cards with secular stamps, and afterwards I sent religious ones. But it seems now that many people who profess a faith send secular cards. It seems to me to be bowing to the secular religion of multiculturalism, a fear that they might be offending someone by proclaiming their faith. I think it's important to uphold our traditions against the inroads of new ideologies like multiculturalism, simply because they are our traditions and there are strenuous efforts to destroy them.

[Jim Kushiner]

Great conversation here, spurred by Marcia S. Just remember to keep it cheerful. Oh boy, I'd hate to see a fight break out about how to observe Christmas. OK?! I am smiling as I write. And the piece, by the way, is not representative of Salvo. It just wouldn't fit in there. I did not post it tongue-in-cheek, but thought it would provoke good conversation about observances in both Advent and Christmas. I think her primary intention was to encourage Christians to be more intentionally religious in observing Christmas, via the cards they send.

I've shopped for cards plenty, and have sometimes struggled to find appropriate cards at the stores. If family photos are expected or useful, I don't see why a family photo can't be included in an appropriate card with the Christmas message, of course. No one could object to that.

[Mike Melendez]

I wish the last comment was tongue in cheek. Was it last year?, I asked a young lady working at the theater who was wearing a button announcing "The Nativity Story" with a bright star, "When is that Christmas movie coming out?"
"Which?" she answered.
"The Nativity Story like on your button," I answered back.
"Oh, is that what that is about?" she said in mild, only mild, surprise.
I took the opportunity to connect Nativity, Christmas, and baby Jesus for her. I hope she remembers.

[Mairnéalach]

Judy- thanks for the recommendation on where to shop for cards. Excellent idea.

Another nice option is monasterygreetings.com. They have some nice ones.

[Francesca]

>>Can you please post Marcia Segelstein's home address so I can send her a card and picture of my kids?

And my dog.

I have ALMOST as much patience for this type of rant during the Christmas season as I do for those who protest Christmas trees and such in civic spaces.<<

I felt the same way. Why be so sour about people who take the trouble to send one a card, even if you're such a Grinch you'd rather not have to look at pictures of their dearly-loved children? What's so wonderfully Christian about being utterly miserable and judging everyone's commitment to Xmas based on the cards they send? I don't think I'll be asking Marcy to pre-approve my choice of Xmas cards.

[Brian Kelly]

Yes, it's nice to hear from people at least this one time a year. And, you know the secular card is going to be from an acquaintance, more likely than a friend who takes their Faith seriously. I agree with Marcia, but, in this forum she must know she's preaching to the choir. Is she not?
I do wish these picture cards came with the parents, though. I get pictures of children when I have no clue what their parents look like anymore. Or their spouse whom I've never seen. What is with that? Then, I have to thank God that children, whom I'm supposed to know, are still being born, even if it's the minimum quota. I've noticed that the big family Christmas pictures always include mom and dad, but the quota families rarely do.

By the way,can anyone give evidence for me that the early Christians used just a "chi" X to refer to Christ, and not the X with "rho" P superimposed? If they did use just the X it would seem to me that it was part of the "discipline of the secret." We don't want to be antiquarians, the Church did grow and mature in her self-expression with the end of the age of catacombs.

I've also read that the early Christians did not emphasize Christmas liturgically, not because they considered the Birth of the Savior unimportant compared to His redemptive passion and His resurrection, but because of the shadow of paganism, which had made a god of the emperor. The celebration of his birthday was a major festival. Witness Herod's celebration of his own Bday. Birthdays were not celebrated by anyone else. The Jews certainly didn't celebrate births. Hence, when the Church was free, and paganism was on the demise, the first council of Nicaea set the day on the liturgical calendar, giving it the holy jubilee the great event deserved. Thank God for inspiring St. Luke to record "the rest of the story."

[DGP]

>>By the way,can anyone give evidence for me that the early Christians used just a "chi" X to refer to Christ, and not the X with "rho" P superimposed?

Early Christians didn't write as much as we do, but I see the chi with the rho superimposed more in Latin than in Greek art. In both ancient languages, the first few letters of a name could be used as an abbreviation. The number of letters used varied with the context and the familiarity of the name. In a Christian context, chi alone leaves little room for doubt, as there is only one Person important enough to qualify for one-letter identification.

>>We don't want to be antiquarians, the Church did grow and mature in her self-expression with the end of the age of catacombs.

Yes, and that includes abbreviations. I used the chi for "Christ" regularly in my seminary notes.

>>I've also read that the early Christians did not emphasize Christmas liturgically,

Even today, Epiphany may arguably hold as much or more theological weight, though the Roman Missal places it third after Easter and Nativity in the precedence of solemnities.

>>Birthdays were not celebrated by anyone else. The Jews certainly didn't celebrate births.

There are two birthday celebrations in the Bible. Both involved executions. :-)

[James A. Altena]

For those who prefer a specifically Christian source for cards (Christmas and every other occasion), I recommend the Scriptorium of the (very traditional) All Saints Sisters of the Poor (Anglican) in Catonsville, MD. [The Sr. Elaine of the daughter house here in Philadelphia is a dear friend.] All of the cards (and bookmarks) are reproductions of lovely original hand-drawn and tinted illustrations by the artistically gifted among the sisters themselves, generally accompanied by verses from Scripture or quotes from great Christian writers. Unfortuantely the catalogue itself is not online, but can be ordered from the sisters for free. [Though they only accept phone calls live for about 2-3 hours per weekday -- something like 10:30 - 11:30 and 2:30 - 4:30.] The cards and bookmarks are extremely inexpensive (some as cheap as 10 cents!); their only possible disadvantage is their small size (most cards are 3 1/2 x 5 1/2), which does not allow for insertion of letters on 8 1/2 x 11 sheets of paper.

There seems to be several web sites for the sisters; I believe the first is the newest and most current.

http://www.asspconvent.org/ministries.htm

http://freepages.religions.rootsweb.com/~oakcottagefamily/AllSaintsConvent/

http://www.orders.anglican.org/caroa/Directory/AllSaintsSisters.htm

[Christianity]

I thank the author for a good post and for the first time I got to know about the cards which may create a good image on categories of photos.

[Stuart Koehl]

We typically buy icon cards of the Nativity, either in the parish bookstore or from a monastic source online. There are many different icons of the Nativity, so, though all are cards are similar, we don't have to send the same cards every years. Sometimes we buy two different sets, so that not all our friends and family get the same one. We shove pictures of ourselves, and the ubiquitous Year in Review letter inside, as well as personalized messages where appropriate. We also buy a box of secular cards for those people we know aren't religious but who observe the season, anyway. And a few Chanukkah cards, for those friends and family.

[Judy Warner]

I figure that my secular friends can practice tolerance and inclusiveness, and if they don't appreciate a card showing a 15th century manuscript leaf with a nativity scene set into a page of music, there's something wrong with them. Ditto the verse from Luke inside. And I've never sent my Jewish family cards anyway (though I do bring gifts for the children at the big family Hanukkah party).

[Chris Grasse, South Portland, Maine]

Every year I try to trim down my Christmas card list. Who gets left out? I always start this way, but then I just keep writing out cards, and they always get written - everyone gets a card. The minute I have the cards done and sent, something inside me drops into a deeper gear and I begin to really enjoy what Christmas is all about: Jesus Christ. I once had eighteen boxes of decorations. Now I have four. Jesus keeps becoming more and more important, and the peripheral stuff less so. I think it is a matter of looking at our values. They more or less determine your activities at Christmas. Merry Christmas, everyone! - Chris.