Garrison Keillor's Secret Celebration

One of our readers at Brandywine Books alerted me to this recent column by Garrison Keillor, of whom I imagine you've heard.

It's a very odd column, from someone who (I'm told) is a very odd man. The most interesting part is here:

Unitarians listen to the Inner Voice and so they have no creed that they all stand up and recite in unison, and that's their perfect right, but it is wrong, wrong, wrong to rewrite "Silent Night." If you don't believe Jesus was God, OK, go write your own d*mn "Silent Night" and leave ours alone. This is spiritual piracy and cultural elitism and we Christians have stood for it long enough. And all those lousy holiday songs by Jewish guys that trash up the malls every year, Rudolph and the chestnuts and the rest of that dreck. Did one of our guys write "Grab your loafers, come along if you wanna, and we'll blow that shofar for Rosh Hashanah"? No, we didn't.

This remarkable passage is notable for being at once gratifying and infuriating. It does my heart good to know that Mr. Keillor cares about the truths of Christianity, the uniqueness of Christ, the importance of the Incarnation, all that culturally inconvenient stuff that makes the difference between true belief and mere sentiment. Good on him for that.

But then he goes on to insult Jewish songwriters (like Johnny Marks, whom Mark Steyn has been eulogizing this season) who write perfectly pleasant, seasonal songs loved by millions, as if propagating some kind of low dose Blood Libel. It's the sort of out-of-left-field change of argument one expects from a stubborn spouse (or so I've heard) who's in a bad mood and just wants a fight.

I have a theory on what Keillor's really thinking here. Like most theories (most especially mine) it's probably wrong, but I'll wheel it out and let you tell me what you think. Bear in mind that I can claim some insight into Keillor's mind because, like him, I'm a) a small town Minnesotan by upbringing, b) pathologically shy (though I've never figured out how somebody as diffident as he claims to be has managed to be married so many times. Wish I knew where to shop for that kind of shyness), and c) closely associated with Lutheranism.

One irony that's struck me increasingly in recent years, though I don't think I've ever mentioned it publicly before, is the Cultural Christmas Conundrum.

I remember that when I was young, one of the standard tropes of Christian ministers, in print and from the pulpit, was, “Christmas is a holy season! Keep your secular commercialism out of our holiday!” It was remarkably close in some ways to what Keillor says in his column. I must admit I always listened with mixed feelings, because I really liked all the music and decorations and colored lights of the secular observance—and still do.

Then something happened that should have delighted the preachers. Our society suddenly began to say, “This is not Christmas! This is a winter festival! A happy holiday! Festivus! It has nothing to do with any religious observance whatever!”

And behold, the ministers were not pleased. Instead of declaring victory, they immediately started complaining about the secularization of the public square, boycotting companies that forbade their employees to say “Merry Christmas.” (I myself have never forgiven Target for chasing out the Salvation Army bell ringers.)

What offended the pastors in the old days, and continues to offend Keillor now, is reflexive, non-credal cultural Christianity. It was something we used to denounce, but now look back on with something more than mere nostalgia. Cultural Christianity was a reserve (not a saving one, but not without value either) of moral and civic memory that helped bind us together as a society. We see it disappearing around us, and are suddenly afraid, as if that wall we just demolished in our house turned out—against our expectations—to be a bearing wall.

Keillor, I think, is coming at the same issue from the other side. While his Christian faith would appear to be genuine, I don't think he believes it has any cultural significance, or should. Like most of his friends on the Left, he considers traditional Christian morality purely a private matter. It's not only unconstitutional, but positively dangerous (he would say) to allow it to affect public life.

Keillor's vision of true Christianity may be revealed in this segment of his column:

Christmas does not need any improvements. It is a common ordinary experience that resists brilliant innovation. Just make some gingerbread persons and light three candles and sing softly in dim light about the poor man gathering winter fu-u-el and the radiant beams and the holly and the ivy, and you've got it.

This is the liberal's vision of the proper societal role of Christianity. Something quiet and dim. Done furtively, even shamefully, out of the public eye. You're free to believe anything you like, of course. Just keep it to yourself. Don't demand the right to apply it to public matters or political issues. Don't act as if it has any real-world importance.

This is, of course, the People's Republic of China model of religious freedom.

If Keillor wants to find the kind of Christmas he's looking for, China might be a good place to look.

(Cross-posted at Brandywine Books)

Comments

[Peter J. O'Leary]

China might be a good place to look for us all. Matthew 18:20. 'Nuff said.

Religious freedom notwithstanding, I'm having the best Christmas of my life. Seriously. Away from my family and unemployed, I've had time to fashion some gifts with my hands. Trudging to the dollar store for stocking stuffers and trimmings, I passed a partially deflated lawn Rudolph. At the dollar store, I gazed into the eyes of my fellow Chicagoans. We smiled as we listened to the reverb drenched refrains of Johnny Mark's Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree. Gotta love that reverb.

Still no chestnuts, jolly holly, or lights, save for the ones on my yet unerected tree and the Advent wreath with one yet unlit candle. Three empty stockings are hung by the wreath, awaiting gifts fashioned by my hands, some candies. and dollar store chotchkies.

I also have memories, though they're bittersweet. I have my Church, where, in front of the alter lies a man asleep in the Lord - memory eternal Job. Still, the best Christmas I can remember.

The anticlimax to my Christmas may come on the night of the 26th when I have to work 'til 3am, playing music for tipsy post Christmas revelers. My Jewish guitar player knows more Irving Berlin and Johnny Marks tunes than I do. Pray for me.

Save for my fellow dollar store denizens, the saints singing in my Church Thursday night, and all those souls I pass on the street, the stores, and the buses, this will be private, furtive Christmas for me. Still, the best Christmas for me. I suppose Garrison Keillor knows something of this feeling.

As to your accusation of Blood Libel, it doesn't come in low doses. With all respect, this resembles the radical feminists' claim that marriage is a legalized form of rape. It's also like crying 'fire!' in a crowded theater; remember, libel is not libel if the allegations are true. If there really is a fire, I'd like to know.

The furious row of blood libel accusations involving Israeli organ harvesting is not quite over. The New Jersey organ scandal notwithstanding, the Guardian published this story on Monday.

I apologize to the editors for this contentious diversion. However, if a blogger includes blood libel and Jew in the same article, full background is warranted. Either that, or leave it out. Preferably the latter.

God bless us, everyone.

[Jim Kushiner]

"Minnesotan by upbringing, b) pathologically shy"

So you must know the difference between a Swedish introvert and a Swedish extrovert? The Swedish extrovert looks at *your* shoes when he's talking to you.

[Peter J. O'Leary]

Keillor identifies with the Minnesotan 'ya hey dere' almost in the way the Coen's Fargo characters do. I think he is Scottish by descent, and Episcopalian.
His apparent diffidence is probably better characterized by upper-midwest stoicism. Still, like Touchstone editors, all above average.

[Mack]

Without Judaism there would be no Christmas. A series of Bishops of Rome have said that Judaism is a part of us. We can't be Manichaeans or some sort of cult or private club. Before all this began I did not know that so many Christmas pop songs were written by Jews; well, good for them! We owe them thanks for making the season that much more fun.

[Kandyce]

I work at a Target and we have a Salvation Army bell ringer right outside our front door. (Also. the signs above the checkout lanes proclaim "Merry Christmas" and Target is a Minnesotan company). So please consider these things when you are pondering corporate forgiveness this year. :)

[Lars Walker]

When did that change? Their policy was announced with considerable controversy several years ago, and I never heard anything about a change. I'd be happy to shop there again--it's convenient.

[Matt]

>>This is the liberal's vision of the proper societal role of Christianity. Something quiet and dim. Done furtively, even shamefully, out of the public eye. You're free to believe anything you like, of course. Just keep it to yourself. Don't demand the right to apply it to public matters or political issues. Don't act as if it has any real-world importance. <<

Such sectarian polemics clearly misrepresent, uncharitably, the vision of many (I would say most) liberals. I belong to a relatively liberal denomination, the ELCA. There is nothing "furtive" or "shameful" about our worship or the application of our faith to public matters. My political beliefs are as strongly and sincerely informed by my faith as those of any fundamentalist. How could they not be? I am defined by them. My faith will likely lead me to stress certain issues (e.g., social issues such as health care) above others (e.g., condemning feminism.) BTW, the reference to China in this context is absurd!

I'm not the world's greatest fan of Keillor, but I will defend him to some extent by saying he writes tongue in cheek.

[Bananas Gorilla]

>Such sectarian polemics clearly misrepresent, uncharitably, the vision of many (I would say most) liberals.

Decrying liberal rebellion and heresy is an ecumenical task, not a sectarian task.

[Steve Nicoloso]

I will defend him to some extent by saying he writes tongue in cheek.

Tho' what he has written deserves applause far more than defense, I too had tended toward a similar conclusion. Though Keillor is very much a poster-child for the Enlightened NPR Left, he is no tool; and his story-telling gift allows him to assume diverse persona in a very-convincing manner; in this case the person of an injured (and in Keillor's mind rightly offended) traditionalist. Tho' I seriously doubt that very much more than a jot or a tittle separate Keillor from Unitarian orthopraxis, I think this one instance, viz., bowdlerization of beautiful hymns for transparent ideological purposes, is one where he would no doubt (in reality, not just in story-telling) part company with them. And the convincing curmudgeonly affectations were just that: part of his great gift and offered gratis.